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Sunday, April 22, 2018

FIRST CONDON

THE FIRST CONDOM.

    Fragment of the book SHORT TALES FOR ADULTS.
   Orlando Vicente Álvarez.

   It is the story of a teenager who saw his friends boast that they had two eternal condoms in their pockets.
   At last he had his first girlfriend and he was burning for making love.
   He went to the pharmacy and waited for the pharmacist man to come out, but at the same time the pharmacist left and came a woman.
  Self-conscious, he was asked what he wanted. His tongue stuck and he said stammering:
-A one with ... with ... a con...con... conservative, please.
The pharmacists looked at each other and said:
_A conservative of what? You mean a condom, it's not like that, "said the man.
  · That, that ... a pre ... preser ... va ... tivo.
    Once the demand was satisfied, the boy was perplexed where he would hide it from his parents' sight. It occurred to him to put it on the tip of the shoe that in those days were leather and he put the stockings on top to be sure.
   When the big night came, in a dark park full of trees they got excited and when the boy was very hot he wanted to take off the condom but had to undo shoelaces and take off his shoe.
   The act was brief. When they finished - two minutes later, the boy was without a shoe and the girl complained that her parents were going to kill her.
   At last the boy found the shoe and the middle one among the brush.
   At two months: pregnancy, but everything was resolved with a fast wedding.
   A boy was born.
    As the condoms had two butterflies in the front. The baby was named Papillon.
   Moral: never trust the Chinese condoms that were the only ones that entered Cuba in those times.